Sonward Youth Programs

By Miss Kim

I want to tell you something simple that might just shift the atmosphere in your home: Talk to your kids every week… on purpose. Not about what they did wrong. Not about homework. Not about chores. Talk to them just because you love them.

Because here’s the truth, we don’t say enough:

If the only time your child hears your voice is when they’re in trouble, they will start acting up just to hear your voice.

Read that again.

Attention is like air to a child. If they don’t get it in healthy ways, they’ll learn how to get it in the wrong ways. And most of the time, that’s not because they’re bad—it’s because they’re hungry. Hungry for connection. Hungry to be seen. Hungry to be reminded that they matter.

Let me ask you something bold.

When was the last time you told your child what they do right?

When did you stop what you were doing, look them in the eye, and say, “I saw how you helped your brother yesterday. That was kind.”

“When you got frustrated and didn’t yell, I noticed. That’s called self-control. That’s strength.”

“I love being your parent. You teach me so much.”

And I know, maybe you never heard that growing up. Maybe you had to figure out who you were without a lot of encouragement. Maybe the only words you ever heard from your own parents were corrections, commands, criticism. But friend, let me say this gently:

You can break the cycle.

You can become the voice your child carries in their heart. And it doesn’t take fancy therapy words or being an expert in parenting. You just need a table, a few minutes, and a decision: I will connect with my child this week just to speak life.

Call it a “Family Talk Night.” Pick a time, once a week. Maybe it’s after dinner on Sunday. Maybe it’s during a drive or walk. Maybe you grab ice cream and sit in the car. Just make it a rhythm.

And during that time, do these three things:

1. Check in without correction. Ask how their week was. Don’t interrupt. Don’t fix. Just listen.

2. Name what’s going right. Even if it’s small. “I see you trying.” “I noticed your effort.”

3. Encourage their soul. Speak life. Bless them. Pray with them. Or just say, “I’m proud of you.”

That’s it.

You don’t need a perfect script. You just need presence. And that weekly presence? It becomes healing. It becomes a habit. And over time, it becomes a foundation your child can stand on—even when life gets loud.

“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.”

—1 Thessalonians 5:11

Family is first. Let’s not wait until they mess up to engage. Let’s build them up when nothing’s wrong, so they know they are deeply loved, even when everything feels wrong.

Take the time. Make the space. Speak the words.

You may be planting something your child will grow into for the rest of their life.